Silly or sage-like? YOU DECIDE!!!
For some god knows reason I’ve decided to let you see a little poem I’ve written. I originally wrote it to email to the other members of the psychotherapy training course I’m doing instead of sending a Christmas card (which I couldn’t afford to do anyway – see Back in the water, unfortunately it's Shit Creek), unfortunately, I’ve lost all of their details and so won’t be able to let them read it until my next course day at least.
Now there are a couple of things I feel I need to state before letting you read it.
May Be Still
or
Footprints in the Snow
I may be walking in the dark
Still there’s a path in front of me
My eyes they may be closed
But still I’m trying to see
This room it may be silent
Still I can hear you knock
Past times they may be frozen
Still I try to start the clock
The way it may be treacherous
But still I’m reaching for the peak
This voice it once was stolen
But now I try to speak
I’ve not wandered down this road before
I wonder where I go
I wonder if you’ll be there too
Not just footprints in the snow.
Now there are a couple of things I feel I need to state before letting you read it.
- I’m not a poet. As will become excruciatingly obvious to you once you’ve read it I’m sure.
- If it seems a bit heavy or angst ridden then all I will say is - see (1) and that is was written for a group of friends with whom I’m taking a rather deep and meaningful journey with so naturally a bit of, hopefully, deep and meaningful writing is entirely appropriate.
- Yes I do know how egotistical it looks but hey this is my blog so I can do what the hell I like.
- Please feel free to give me some feedback. This is the first poetry I’ve written for about 13 years so I’m pretty curious what other people think of it.
May Be Still
or
Footprints in the Snow
I may be walking in the dark
Still there’s a path in front of me
My eyes they may be closed
But still I’m trying to see
This room it may be silent
Still I can hear you knock
Past times they may be frozen
Still I try to start the clock
The way it may be treacherous
But still I’m reaching for the peak
This voice it once was stolen
But now I try to speak
I’ve not wandered down this road before
I wonder where I go
I wonder if you’ll be there too
Not just footprints in the snow.
posted by Journeyman at 2:51 am
3 Comments:
being an amateur poet myself (write only as a way of expressing myself) i like it! hope you put some more up, and not in 13 years.
I've read much much worse from those who claim to be poets. They rhythme my be a bit lumbering but it is in earnest. As for myself, I'm one of those throwbacks who think that poetry should usualy rhyme and you do that very well. No english lit instructer could give you a failing grade on this.
As for the blind date...ooooh, that's kinda scary.
Thank you both! I can feel my head swelling slightly as I speak. :-)
I was kind of inspired after going through some of my old stuff at my mums house during christmas and finding some really fantastically awful, angst ridden stuff from my teenage years. I thought to myself 'I must be able to do better now, surely?' and it would appear I have. Thanks.
As for the blind date, there is a post in prgress on that but net problems are slowing me down somewhat (long, dull story)
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